Stop Worrying

WHY WE WORRY?

When it comes to concerns about life’s uneasy or potentially disastrous issues, we start to worry.  I don’t think there is a single person in this world that hasn’t experienced a copious bout of the worries in their lifetime — but why do we do this?

There could be a number of reasons, some being:

You feel you need to ‘prepare’ yourself for the worst

You are a ‘glass is half empty’ kind of person and just expect the worst to happen

It is in your experience that disaster always strikes, so worry is a necessary coping mechanism

There are so many things that could go wrong and you feel you need to focus on each one to embody it or try to find a possible solution for it in the event of it happening.

Now, if we actually look at this list from an outsiders point of view — in other words, we take ourselves out of the equation and are impartial — these worries are not only a waste of precious manifesting time but they are a reinforcement of unconstructive potential timelines.

YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK

Just remember you bring about what you think about the most.  This is not meant to scare you, it is a preparation tool so that you can steer your thoughts to more positive neurological pathways.  When you reinforce encouraging scenarios in your mind, as opposed to harmful scenarios (aka worrying), you are creating potential for a more fruitful future.

Easier said than done?

Sure, but it is possible.

Answer this: Has worrying ever solved your problems anyway?

I’m going to take a stab in the dark and say ‘no’ it probably hasn’t, right?  So what can you do now to alleviate any future concerns you have?

Eckhart Tolle has pointed out three memorable and straightforward options that you can apply here, either: remove yourself from the situation (in this case, remove the worry), change it (transmute the worrisome thought form), or accept it totally (surrender to any future possibility).  But let’s go into it a bit more:

HERE ARE 6 SIMPLE TECHNIQUES YOU CAN CARRY OUT WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF IN A STATE OF WORRY:

1. DO SOMETHING 

Swap worry for doing. Can you actually do something about it now?  If the answer is yes, take those first steps and you will begin to lighten the load off your mind.  Even if it means writing the problem down.  Just getting it out of your head and onto paper can be a relief.  You can even then burn the paper or trash it symbolizing your new stance on worry.  Tell your troublesome thought who is the boss!

2. FIND A SOLUTION

Map out a possible solution. Again, it is always helpful to write it down so that your mind is free of it.  When you can look at some achievable solutions, you may gain a better perspective of how you can change or alter the course of your quandary.

3. ACCEPT

If there is absolutely nothing you can do, then try acceptance of what is.  If you cannot change what is, you need to let it go and find peace within your situation.

4. MEDITATE

Solutions will present themselves when we quiet the mind.  There is a wealth of information just waiting for you to tap into when you are in a meditative state.   Clearing your mind of what I like to call ‘mind-static’ (continuous loops of mind chatter) will help you to excavate that diamond of truth and gain a lucid perspective.

5. POSITIVE THINKING

Remind yourself that what you think you attract. Do you want to attract more of what you are worrying about? If not, then switch to thinking about what you do want to manifest in your life and let all negative outcomes go.

6. AFFIRM HAPPY OUTCOMES

Practice positive affirmations and visualize your best outcome to the situation at hand.  Keep reaffirming, every morning and evening, this ‘happy outcome’ and truly feel the emotions of having it in your life right now.

“Make sure your thinking is pointing you in the right direction to manifesting your ideal destination” 

The mind can be trained to think differently — you are 100% in control of your destiny.  You have a choice to rewire your thought process to align with what you want to manifest — don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.  Don’t fall into the trap of being a ‘victim of circumstance’ — this state doesn’t really exist as you create everything and only you can give it the necessary potency.  Playing any kind of victim role is a disempowering position that you should try to not take part in.

You are the powerful creator of your reality and you are in the driver’s seat — where are you going?  Where do you want to go?  Wherever you see yourself in the future just remember, worrying never got anyone anywhere — so…

Hakuna Matata* all the way!

*a Swahili phrase that is literally translated as “There are no worries”

By:

Cherie Roe Dirksen

Crisis Shapes Your Character

I have a slight problem with this Bible verse: We can rejoice when

  we run into problems… (Romans 5:3)

Honestly, I don’t exactly rejoice when I run into problems.  I don’t

say, “Oh goodie, my kids are sick!” or “Yabadabadoo, I just had a car

accident!”

But perhaps God isn’t telling me to rejoice because of the problem.

Instead, God is telling me to rejoice because of the purpose of the

problem.

I believe problems have many purposes. And I believe the most

important purpose of problems is to shape our Character.

After 30+ years of following God, I’ve come to a very BIG and very

DISTURBING realization. (Warning: You won’t like what I’m going

to say.) I’ve come to realize that God values my Character more than

  my Comfort.

Ouch…

 

Yes, God Values Your Character More Than Your Comfort

I wish it ain’t so.

I wish His first priority was my comfort. I wish His first priority was to solve my problems.

Hey, don’t get me wrong. I believe He cares for you when you’re sick. He cares for you when you can’t pay your bills. He cares for you when you’re broken hearted. He cares for you when you worry about your future.

All those things are important to Him, but His first priority is to shape your Character.

I understand this.

Because I’m a father of two boys. As their Dad, I’ve got a lot of wishes for them. I want them to be handsome, but that’s already a done deal because of genetics. (They take from their mother.) I want them to be healthy; I want them to be wealthy; But more than healthy and wealthy, I want them to be godly. Because if they’re not godly, they won’t be happy.

More than anything else, as a father, I want them to be loving, faithful, humble, honest, selfless…

God is a Father too. I repeat: He values your Character more than your Comfort. Your soul more than your body. Your eternal life more than your physical life.

Because in your death, you’ll leave behind your comfort, your career, your cars, your clothes, your cash,… The only thing you’ll bring to Heaven is your Character. 

 

3 Things That A Crisis Does To Your Character

A Crisis has three unique effects on your Character. So unique, very few things in this world can do these three things.

 

1. A Crisis Diagnoses Your Character

You’ll know what kind of Character you have notwhen everything is rosy, fine, and dandy. Not when the sun is shining. Not when all your plans go smoothly. Not when everyone likes you.

You’ll know what kind of Character you have when your dreams are delayed, when your trials abound, and when your obstacles multiply.

Let me give you an analogy: Your character is like a tea bag.

You won’t know if a tea bag is any good just by looking at it. Or smelling it. Or feeling it in your hand. You’ll only know if a teabag is good if you dunk it in hot water. So let me ask you a question: How do you act when you get dunked in hot water?

Character is how you behave when life is very far from what how you imagined it to be. Character is how you behave when everything is totally going wrong and you’re being attacked by problems at every side.

How do you react when trials come? When people criticize you? When friends betray you? When others don’t believe you? When you have no money to pay your bills? When your kids are going astray? When a family member has cancer?

Amidst the trials, will you remain faithful?

Will you remain loving?

Will you remain patient?

Will you remain kind?

The Bible says, When you have many kinds of troubles, you should be full of joy, because you know that these troubles test your faith, and this will give you patience. (James 1:2-3)

A Crisis diagnoses your Character. But it only doesn’t diagnose…

 

2. A Crisis Develops Your Character

Imagine Jaime, a 4-year old boy wandering into the kitchen.

While there, he sees a frying pan filled with yummy French fries. As he walks near it, his mother sees him and says, “Don’t you dare touch that pan. It will burn you!” So the little boy walks away, pouting that he didn’t get to do what he wanted to do.

The next day, he’s in the kitchen again. And he sees the frying pan with a new batch of French fries in it. He smells the delicious aroma of newly cooked potatoes. He looks around and doesn’t see his Mom. In his little mind, he thinks, “No Mom, No Rules!”

He touches it. And instantly, the house is filled with a piercing shriek, “Mommeeeeeeeeee!”

Flash-forward a few minutes later: The mother is holding her little boy’s hand under running water. He continues to cry because the burn still stings. And he will never forget the lesson for the rest of his life.

Trials are like that. They burn. But they burn for a reason: To teach us lessons we’ll never forget for the rest of our life.   I agree when Proverbs 20:30 says,Sometimes it takes a painful situation to make us change our ways.

Here’s a law of this universe: Tests are repeated until the lesson is learned.

Little Jaime’s little hand will get burned again and again if he doesn’t learn his lesson. The hot pan doesn’t care how many little hands it will burn. The hot pan is a relentless, tireless teacher.

My strong recommendation? Learn the lesson as quickly as you can. When it comes to lessons from trials, be a sponge. Soak it in. Don’t be hard headed.

And there’s even a better way of learning…

 

Priceless Tip:

 

Try To Get The Teaching Without The Trial

4-year old Jaime has a 3-year old sister named Antonia. And Antonia saw her brother cry in pain for thirty long minutes. She heard the wailing. She saw the red burn in his little hand. Somehow, she felt the pain he was feeling.

A few weeks later, Antonia was playing in the neighbour’s house. While there, she wanders into the kitchen because she smelled macaroni and cheese. And there it was on a hot frying pan on top of the kitchen table.

She looks at it and remembers the painful scenes two weeks ago. She remembers the agony of her brother Jaime. No matter how delicious it looked, she doesn’t touch it. Instead, she calls someone to give her some macaroni and cheese.

We need to be as wise as little Antonia: Try to get the teaching without the trial. All you have to do is to relive their suffering. To hear their cry. To feel their pain.To listen to their stories.

I love listening to people’s stories. I love talking to successful people and asking them, “What made you successful?” But I also love talking to people who failed and asking them, “What made you fail?” I learn so much.

Finally, there’s a third thing that a Crisis does to your Character…

 

3. A Crisis Defends Your Character

If you’re brave enough, I want you to do a 3-phase experiment at home. (Warning: Be prepared to be wet and dirty.)

Phase One is simple. First, catch a frog from your backyard. A real, slimy, green frog. (I told you it’s going to be wet and dirty.)

Second, boil a kettle of water. Once the water hits boiling point, drop the frog into the kettle.

You’ll observe that the frog will not like what you just did. He won’t be pleased. He’ll jump out of the kettle with superfrog strength. Because of this traumatic experience, he may experience a nervous breakdown, but if you provide adequate psychotherapy, he’ll get over it.

Phase Two is more interesting.

First, catch the frog that’s jumping around your kitchen. Tell him that psychotherapy will have to wait as he is needed for another experiment.

Second, get another kettle and fill it with tap water—and drop the frog into the kettle.

You’ll notice that Mr. Kermit won’t jump out the way it did in Phase One. In fact, you’ll observe that the frog is relaxed, doing gentle breaststrokes in the water.

Next, place the kettle on your cooking range and start a low fire—the minimum heat possible.

You’ll observe that the frog won’t even notice.  In fact, you made him even more comfortable. He starts doing backstrokes. If you listen close enough, you may hear the frog whistling the tune of My Heart Goes Onby Celine Dion.

And soon, it closes its eyes, dozes off, and in a few minutes—as the water is steaming hot, you realize that you no longer have to pay for frog psychotherapy because the frog is dead.

Here’s Phase 3…

Throw in some chopped carrots, and you have something to eat for dinner.

What’s my point?

Sometimes, a crisis is good because it wallops you. It shocks you. It wakes you up. It burns your hand and you scream, “Mommeeeeeeeeee!”

But perhaps that’s the point! So that you won’t end up as dinner soup.

 

Difficulties Keep You Away From Danger

Honestly, I wish I never went through my problems. I wish everything went my way.

I wish I was never molested as a child.

I wish my wife never lost her three babies via miscarriage.

I wish I didn’t have to go through each day with leadership burdens on my shoulder.

But looking back, I thank God for my trials! Because I’ve noticed that every trial that I went through made me cry out to God, “Mommeeeeeeeeee!”

When you know that only God can save you, it keeps you humble. It removes your pride. It pushes you to seek God.

About problems, the Bible says, It was the best thing that could have happened to me, for it taught me to pay attention to your laws. (Psalm 119:71-72)

Let me tell you one of my favorite stories…

 

 

What Kind Of Scars Do You Have?

One day, a mother and her little boy went to the farm.

Through the kitchen window, she saw her little boy dive into the lake behind the house. It was such a glorious sight, just seeing her son swim through the water.

Suddenly, she screamed in terror. For from the opposite direction, something was also swimming to her boy’s direction—and he didn’t know. It was an alligator!

She ran out to him, all the while shouting to the top of her lungs, “Get out of the lake! There’s an alligator!”

The little boy saw the oncoming alligator. He turned around and started swimming back as fast as he could.

When he touched land, two things happened at the same time. The mother grabbed his arms but the alligator sunk its sharp teeth on his legs. What happened next was a tug-o-war between his mother and the beast. The alligator was very strong, but so was his mother’s love. She simply wouldn’t let go.

A few minutes later, a man who was driving in his truck saw what was happening. Moving quickly, he got out of his truck, grabbed his rifle, and shot the alligator.

A couple of weeks later, the little boy was in the hospital recuperating from his wounds. A journalist entered his room, wanting to interview him.

After a few questions, she asked, “Would you mind if we get a photo of your wounds?”

“Sure,” the little boy said. “I have two wounds. Which ones do you want to photograph?”

The journalist didn’t understand. “What do you mean?”

The little boy removed his blanket and exposed his scarred legs. “These are the scars from the alligator’s teeth.” His legs were covered with ugly puncture wounds.

He then said, “But my other wounds—that’s what I’m proud of. He exposed his arms, and showed off the ugly scars of his mother’s fingernails that dug deep into his skin. “I love these scars because they represent my mother’s love.   The reason why I have these scars is because my mother would not let go of me.”

Friend, if you look into your life, you’ll find that you too have these scars. They come from a God that held on to you and wouldn’t let go. Were it not for those scars, you would have been swallowed up by the enemy.

Perhaps you didn’t get that job you prayed for. Perhaps you didn’t get the guy you wanted. Perhaps you didn’t get the project you worked for. God sees the future.  He saw that if you got what you wanted, you would be swallowed up by the enemy. So He pulled you back. You got hurt. You got denied. You got rejected. Yes, you have scars—but these are scars of God’s Love for you!

Trials have a way of bringing you closer to God.

Dear friend, bounce from your trials.

Bounce forward.

Bounce Godward!

 

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

Don’t Be Too Hard On Yourself!

One day, a very discouraged man visited Norman Vincent Peale. He told the good Reverend he had nothing to live for.

“Everything is gone, everything is hopeless. I’ve lost the heart for living.”

Norman Vincent Peale got a piece of paper, drew a vertical line in the middle, and said, “This is your life. Let’s write down a list of the things you’ve lost on the left side, and the things that you still have on the right side.”

The man shook his head, “You won’t need the right side. I have nothing left in my life.”

Norman Vincent Peale said, “When did your wife leave you?”

The man was shocked. “My wife didn’t leave me! She’s right here with me. My wife loves me!”

Norman said, “That’s fantastic! Let’s write that down as number one on the right side of the paper: ‘Wife with me’. Now tell me, “When did your kids go to prison…”

“Prison?” the man asked in   “My kids are right here at home!”

“Fantastic! Let’s write it down here as number two: ‘Kids not in jail.’”

Norman continued asking similar questions, and the man got the point, and began to smile. He said, “I guess my life isn’t so bad after all!”

 

Perception Is Everything

Your perception of reality is your reality.

Your life has always two sides—a left side and a right side—the bad stuff happening and the good stuff happening.

A lot of people spend the whole day looking at the left side—the side where they list everything that’s wrong with their life. 24 hours a day, they think about it, meditate on it, analyze it, mull over it. That’s why they’re miserable.

Friend, make a decision to spend the whole day looking at the right side of your life.

I know. This is very difficult.

Especially when you fail.

There was a man who failed big time in the Bible…

 

You’re Like Peter

Peter was the Number 1 Apostle, the top man, the leader of the pack. And he prided himself as the bold one.

While everyone in the boat was terrified by the storm, he walked on water. While everyone couldn’t say who Jesus was, he proclaimed out, “You are the Christ, the Son of the Living God!”

Yet at the critical point, he failed.

When his loyalty was most needed, he turned chicken. He became a coward. How? He denied His Master three times.

When a maid said, “Hey, I know you. You’re with that guy Jesus, right?”

Peter said, “Je.. Je… Who are you talking about? Never heard of him. Sorry, wrong number.”

She said, “No, you’re the one. I don’t forget faces. I’m sure you’re the assistant of that guy Jesus who’s being tried right now and will most likely be crucified tomorrow.”

Peter cursed, “Heck, you’re mistaken, girl. I don’t know him!”

Imagine how terrible he felt after that night.

Imagine the guilt that ate up his soul.

Here’s my bet: For days, Peter was too hard on himself.

Like all of us, we are our own most cruel critic.

From my experience, our most toxic relationship is with ourselves. We are our worst enemy.

When we fail, we emotionally beat ourselves endlessly.

We label ourselves a “big loser”.

We curse ourselves to fail forever.

 

If Jesus Wasn’t Jesus…

Days later, Jesus rose from the dead.

And Jesus had this incredible conversation with Peter that showed us how God deals with our failures…

I love this scene!

Because Jesus didn’t focus on Peter’s failures.

If Jesus wasn’t Jesus, He’d say, “Peter, let’s talk about the night when you did that shameful thing of running away…”

“Oh gosh, Lord, I… I… I…”

“Tsk, tsk. I thought you were brave. Peter, you were a big, fat, 100%, unadulterated coward.”

“(Gulp) Well, uh, there was a lot of pressure that night, and…”

“And I thought I could count on you, Peter. I thought you were a loyal and faithful friend. Sheesh, was I mistaken.”

“I’m so sorry…”

“Shame on you, Peter. You don’t really love me.”

“Uh, I guess I don’t.”

“And my goodness, you denied me not once, not twice… but three times! What a weakling. What have you got to say for yourself?”

“I’m ashamed, Lord.”

“Oh, you better be….”

Jesus didn’t say those words.

In this conversation, Jesus focused on Peter’s love for him. He asked him three times, “Do you love me?” And when Peter answered yes, he said, “Feed my sheep.” (John 21:15-17)

Jesus didn’t believe that Peter’s denials defined him.

What was Jesus doing?

He wanted to tell Peter, “Hey, I know you really love me. I don’t focus on your failures. I don’t look at what you did wrong. I look at what you did right.”

 

God’s Focus Is Different From Ours

For so long, religion used to make people feel bad about themselves.

But that doesn’t come from God!

This message is very close to my heart.

Once upon a time, I used to call myself a failure.

Because I would focus on my weaknesses.

I would focus on my sins.

And the more I focused on my sins, the more I did them.

Until I became addicted to my sins.

You see, there are two kinds of guilt…

o   Demonizing Guilt

o   Detoxifying Guilt

The first guilt demonizes you. When you sin, demonizing guilt says, “You’re bad. There’s nothing good in you.”

The second guilt detoxifies you. It separates the sin from the sinner. When you sin, detoxifying guilt says, “This isn’t you. You’re better than this. Stand up. Move on!”

Demonizing guilt depresses you. It pushes you to sin even more. It’s the guilt of the addict.

Detoxifying guilt lifts you up. It pushes you to become who you really are.

Tell me now.

What kind of guilt do you have?

 

The World Likes Focusing On Your Weaknesses

One day, two women friends were talking…

Friend #1: “May balita ako sa ‘yo. Magaasawa na si Peklat kay Duling!” (I have news for you. Scar-face will get married to cross-eyed!)

Friend #2: “Talaga? Akala ko pa naman, ang magiging asawa ni Duling eh si Taba!” (Is that so? I thought Cross-eyed will get married to Fatso.)

Friend #1: “Hinde ah! Hindi mo ba alam na si Taba ay magiging pare in two years?” (That’s not true. Didn’t you know that Fatso would be a priest in two years?)

Friend #2: “Hah? Diba si Pango yung magiging pare?”

Friend #1: “Lumang balita na yan. Si Pango ngayon ay boyfriend ni Daldal!” (That’s old news. Flat-nose is now engaged with Motor-mouth!)

 

 

   The Root Of Our Personal Problems

The world taught us to focus on our weaknesses.

And that’s why we like to focus on our weaknesses.

We hear this “voice recording” in our minds, saying…

“You’re too small.”

“You have too many pimples.”

“You’re nose is too big.”

“You’re not bright enough.”

“You don’t have enough talents.”

“You’re a mess.”

“You’re too weak.”

“You’re too poor.”

I’ve met a lot of people who don’t have a good opinion about themselves. And believe me, this is the root of most of their personal problems.

This is the root of why they have relationship struggles.

This is the root of why they’re trapped in mediocre living.

Your opinion of yourself is the most important opinion you’ll ever have.

Why? People will see you the way you see yourself.

 

Your Weakness Is God’s Redirection

Don’t be too hard on yourself because of your weakness.

Your weakness isn’t God’s rejection but God’s redirection.

Being weak in one area means that’s not where God wants you to serve. A weakness means you’re supposed to serve in another area.

I remember the story of this jobless man who applied to work as a janitor of a huge company.

After the HR manager interviewed him, he said, “You’re hired. Just give me your email address so I can email you the application form to fill…”

The man said, “I’m sorry, I don’t have an email address. I don’t know how to use the computer.”

“Then I’m sorry too,” said the HR manager, “if you don’t have an email, that means you don’t exist. And someone who doesn’t exist won’t get a job.”

The jobless man walked out of room totally discouraged.

He only had P300 in his pocket. That was all the money he had. He remembered his little daughter at home. He imagined her going hungry and decided to do something.

He went to the market and bought a box of tomatoes. He then went door to door, selling the tomatoes. In three hours, he was able to double his money to P600. He repeated the operation 3 times that day, returning home with P2400.

The man realized that he can survive this way!

Shortly after, he bought a cart, then a truck, and after a couple of years, he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.

Ten years later, he was a big-time food distributor, a very successful and wealthy man.

At that time, a friend sold him life insurance.

When this wealthy man was filling out his insurance application form, it asked for his email address. He told his friend, the insurance agent, “I don’t have an email address.”

The friend said, “Wow, you don’t have an email, and yet you succeeded to build an empire.  Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an email?”

The man thought for awhile and said, “Janitor.”

 

How My Weakness Showed Me How To Serve God

Because he had no email, he was rejected.

But that rejection was a redirection.

Let me tell you my story.

When I was growing up as a kid, I had a weakness.

According to my school teachers, I wasn’t very intelligent.

Because I didn’t like reading books.

I wasn’t a fan of books.

I’d rather watch TV and play with my toys.

But at the age of 12, something happened: I had a spiritual conversion. I came to know Jesus in a personal way.

That was when my mother asked me to read a small book entitled, Prison To Praise.

       And for the first time, I actually opened the book not from school!

Why?

First of all, the book was a tiny, thin book.

Second, Mom said it was filled with exciting “miracle” stories.

       That little book was a simple, true-to-life story of a worldly man who lived far away from God, who went to prison, came to know Jesus, and begun to live a life of praise.

The book was so simple, so easy to understand, I was hooked. When I finished it, I wanted to read more books about God. I remember reading Perfect Joy of St. Francis after that. And I never stopped reading ever since.

I realized that I wasn’t allergic to reading books.

I was just allergic to reading difficult books.

Like my textbooks in school.

Difficult books that had long words, long sentences, and long paragraphs. I felt the Authors were so intelligent, I couldn’t understand what they were trying to say.

 

And Then I Became An Author

When I hit 20, I wrote my first book.

And I wrote the kind of book that I would like to read.

It was a very thin book.

And I wrote using short words, short sentences, and short paragraphs. And I told very simple stories.

Today, 19 books later, I still write in the same way.

And guess what? All my 19 books are bestsellers.

You know why I’m a successful author today?

Because I wasn’t too intelligent.

Imagine if I was intelligent.

Imagine if I liked reading difficult, scholarly books.

Then I’d probably write like that too.

Would I be able to reach the audience I’m reaching now?

Would I be able to write 19 bestselling books?

I don’t think so.

I thank God I’m not too intelligent.

Because my weakness has become my strength.

 

Your Weakness Will Bless The World

What is your weakness?

Your handicap?

Your limitation?

Don’t be too hard on yourself.

You’ll be surprised that your weakness will be the source of strength for others around you.

Once upon a time, there were two friends named Pok and Nat. Pok and Nat worked as Water Bearers. Each morning, they’d draw water from the well and deliver to their respective little barrios.

But Pok had a little problem. His pail was broken. It had a little crack and was leaking. So by the time he arrived in his barrio, his pail was already half-empty. And Pok had no money to buy a new pail, so he kept using it.

Because of his broken pail, Pok had to take double the trips Nat took. Nat would take 10 trips but Pok had to make 20.

But through it all, Pok kept smiling as he did his work.

One morning, Nat asked him, “Pok, why are you always smiling? I know that your pail is cracked. And you have no money to replace it.”

Pok said, “Take a look at the path I travel everyday. What do you see?”

Nat was shocked. All along the path, he saw a beautiful row of flowers!

“Because I knew my pail was cracked,” Pok said, “I planted flower seeds along the way. Everyday, as I walked this path, my pail watered these flowers. Tomorrow, I’ll harvest the flowers and sell them in the city.”

Why was Pok happy?

Because he found a way to use his weakness.

Friend, I ask you again.

What is your weakness?

What is your limitation?

What is your handicap?

Plant seeds beneath your weakness.

Soon, you’ll harvest them and prosper.

And the world will be a richer place because of your weakness.

Your weakness is a wonderful opportunity for God to manifest His power. The Bible says, My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

 

Jesus Takes What Peter Offers

One last thing.

Remember what I said above—about Jesus asking Peter three times, “Do you love me?”

You see, the English language has only one word for love.

The Greek language has four words for love. And two of those Greek words were used in this conversation: Agape and Filia.

Agape means God’s love, perfect and eternal.

Filia means the best of human love.

Here’s how the conversation went along…

Jesus asked Peter, “Do you agape me?”

Peter said, “I filia you.”

Jesus asked him again, “Do you agape me?”

Peter said again, “I filia you.”

Peter was honest. The painful wound of his three denials is still very raw in his conscience. He was telling Jesus, “I’m a mess, Lord. I can’t give you agape. But I’ll try to give you filia.”

On the third question, Jesus asked, “Peter, do you filia me?”

Jesus accepted what Peter could offer at that moment.

And today, he accepts what you offer to him, your weaknesses included.

Offer your life to Him today.

 

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

Change Your Vocabulary

You need to learn a new kind of vocabulary.

Instead of saying, “I have some failures,” say, “I have some lessons.”

Instead of saying, “I have some problems,” say, “I have some hidden blessings.”

Instead of saying, “I’m going through a crisis,” say, “I’m going through a transformational experience.”

Instead of saying, “I don’t have money,” say, “I’m temporarily broke but the blessings are on the way.”

If you want to change your life, you need to change your talk.

Everyday, a tidal wave of words flow out of your mouth.

Studies say that men speak 20,000 words a day. And women speak 30,000.   (I didn’t invent that. Just reporting the facts.  But I’m sure you know of some exceptions. There are men who speak 50,000 words a day, like Preachers like me.)

Don’t be shocked. If you live until 90, a typical person would have spoken 730 million words. If someone just recorded all that you said, and put them in book form, you would have written 14,600 books.

Pretty amazing, right?

But it’s not the quantity of words that’s important. It’s the quality of the words that’s important. The quality of your words will determine the quality of your life—including the life of the people around you.

Do your words bless or curse?

Do your words heal or cause disease?

Do your words give life or give death?

Do your words nourish or poison?

Do your words lift up or lower down?

Do your words encourage or discourage?

Be careful with your words…

 

3 Kinds Of Bread

You know this already—God’s Word is like bread. It always nourishes. (Matthew 4:4)

But here’s something you may not know: God designed your words to also become nourishing bread.

But in reality, our words aren’t always nourishing.

In fact, I compare our words to three kinds of bread: wheat bread, white bread, and waste bread.

Wheat Bread has all the nourishment intact. It hasvitamin B6, vitamin E, magnesium, zinc, folic acid… And fiber. (That’s why it’s chewy.) Fiber prevents heart attacks and sweeps your intestines clean.

White Bread tastes nice and soft and delicious. But it doesn’t nourish. It doesn’t make you healthy. Because white bread is made of white flour, and it’s stripped from all vitamins, minerals, and fiber.

Waste Bread is bread that is stale. It’s already covered with mold and bacteria. It can actually poison you and make you sick.

Our words can be like one of these three kinds of bread.

Let me explain…

 

1. Wheat Bread

God wants your words to be like Wheat Bread. They nourish you and they nourish others.

The bible says that what we say should be good and helpful and encouraging (Ephesians 4:29). If it’snot good and helpful and encourage, don’t say it.

Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. (Proverbs 16:24)

One day, I was going through a crisis. Correction. I was going through “a transformational experience”.

It was a time when both my ministries and businesses were going through a tough time. I felt beaten. Defeated. Worn out. I exhausted physically and emotionally.

Right after the Feast, a woman came up to me. And she said, “Bo, you don’t know how you changed my life. Spiritually. Emotionally. Financially. Thank you so much…”

I’ve heard those lines before. Many times. But at that particular time, when I felt discouraged, those words healed me.

But let’s admit it.

Many times, our words don’t encourage at all…

 

2. White Bread

Many of our words are like White Bread. We speak without purpose. We speak without love.   They don’t discourage, but they don’t encourage too. We speak uselessly.

Jesus says, You can be sure that on the Judgment Day you will have to give account of every useless word you have ever spoken. (Matthew 12:36)

What is the Bible saying? Don’t waste your words.

If you have an opportunity to encourage, to inspire, to lift up, and to coach someone—do so. Because people are hungry for nourishment, wisdom, and love. Don’t waste your time by speaking empty words.

And what’s the worst kind of bread of all?

 

3. Waste Bread

Like Waste Bread, your words can poison.

Your mouth is a deadly weapon.

Your words can destroy your children and their future. Your words can destroy your families and your friendships. Your words can destroy your world.

One day, I was talking to a young man who was messed up. He didn’t finish school, he didn’t have a job, he was taking drugs…. In other words, he was really lost.

And then we began talking about his father.

That was when his face began to grimace in pain.

He said, “Brother Bo, I’m 23 years old. In all those years, I’ve never heard my father say nice things to me. Not once did he say he was happy with me. Everytime he talked to me, it was always to tell me I was wrong. And he kept telling me, ‘I’m ashamed that you’re my son! You’ll never amount to anything!’”

Words killed his future.

Because words can be poisonous.

Everytime you open your mouth, you can choose: You can cure or you can curse. It’s up to you.

Let me tell you a true story.

There were two altar boys who lived in two different cities serving in two different churches, but both of them wanted to become priests.

And both of them had the exact same experience.

One altar boy was late for Mass. Because he was in a hurry to do everything he needed to do, he accidentally hit the chalice that contained the wine.

After the Mass, the priest called the boy and shouted, “Get out of here! You’ll never serve as an altar boy!”

At another church, the other altar boy was also late for Mass. And he too hit the chalice that contained the wine, pouring it onto the red carpet. After the Mass, the priest—who happened to be a Bishop—called the altar boy and said, “Hey, everybody makes mistakes. I’m clumsy too. So you know what? Maybe you’ll become a priest too…” and he chuckled.

30 years later, that altar boys became Archbishop Fulton Sheen, one of the most loved religious leaders in America.

The other altar boy? He became Joseph Tito, the ruthless dictator of Yugoslavia, and an atheist.

Words are powerful. They can heal. They can bless. They can encourage. Or they can also curse. They can destroy.

Let me give you four examples.

 

Complement Or Complain

Admit it. Every child is part monster and part angel.

What part will win?

It depends on what part you pour attention to…

Behavior is the plant. Attention is the water.

If you tell your son a thousand times, “You’re a monster! You’re so disobedient!” you’re pouring attention into the monster part. And that monster part will grow, pushing out the angel part—until your child becomes all monster.

Instead of complaining, do the opposite: Complement!

It sounds nuts. But try it out.

For many parents, their preoccupation is to catch their kids doing wrong. Change that. Be preoccupied catching your kids doing good.

If he cares for his baby brother, “Son, I love the way you take care of your younger brother; I’m so proud you’re my son…”;

If you find him happy in your family meals, then tell him, “Thanks for enjoying our time together as a family; it warms my heart that you’ve grown up to be a loving boy.”;

Words like these will change your son.

Remember, your words can bring out the best or the worst in others.

It depends on what words you choose.

Why? People will treat you the way you treat them.

If you keep complaining about their bad behavior, you’ll get more of that bad behavior. If you complement them about their good behavior, you’ll get more of that good behavior.

That’s just how life works.

Here’s the principle: Your words create your world. 

Which brings me to my second example…

 

Correct Or Criticize

Don’t get me wrong. You should correct. That’s part of love. You just need to know how to do it.

You can correct to love or you can criticize to shame. Love is both the motive and manner of your correction.

And always correct within the context of a deep relationship of trust. Don’t correct someone when the relationship isn’t strong.

But sometimes, we go to the other extreme. Even within a close relationship, we don’t correct.  Because we want to be popular instead of loving.  It’s true: Like Wheat Bread, correction is difficult to chew. It’s not as easy to eat as Wheat Bread. But that’s why you have to do it, because it’s nutritious.

Here’s a third example…

 

Refresh Or Ridicule

When I was a kid, I was never good in Sports.

So I dreaded Physical Education. Whenever I had P.E. class in the afternoon, I’d already be wishing I’d get sick that day. So that I’d have an excuse not to attend P.E.

Because almost every class, kids would ridicule me.

It didn’t matter if it was basketball or volleyball or soccer.

I was a klutz.

I couldn’t seem to hit or catch the ball. I couldn’t understand why I was so uncoordinated.

When I was 9-years old, my P.E. was baseball. And I was even more terrified.

True enough, at practice, I couldn’t catch the ball—even if I had that oversized glove.

I was so bad at catching, the Teacher assigned me to the farthest spot in the field. And with his booming voice, he told everyone, “Try to hit your ball towards that kid over there,” pointing to me. “Because he won’t catch the ball, and you’ll get a home run!” He laughed loudly, slapping his knee many times. And all the kids laughed with him.

I pretended to laugh too.

But my little heart was crying inside.

For the next 15 years, I never joined any sport.

When my teacher ridiculed me, something broke within me. Because my Teacher was a person of authority. In my mind, I told myself, “He must know what he’s talking about. He’s my teacher. He says I’m worthless. I’m the most worthless kid in the universe.”

Be careful with ridicule. Be careful with negative humor. Here’s my realization: Nothing hurts more than words.  The Bible says, The words of the reckless pierce like swords. (Proverbs 12:18)   

If you punch someone really hard on the jaw, the swelling subsides after some days. If you cut someone with a knife, the cut heals after some weeks. But if you say something deeply hurting, the damage can remain for the rest of your life.

Society values humor so much, for the sake of making people laugh, we ridicule other people. (I believe negative humor and poking fun at others has a place—between very close friends.)

But I realize that nothing can be more hurting than humiliation. I wish kids would come with a big sign that says, “Fragile—Handle With Care”. So that we won’t be careless with our words.

Don’t ridicule. Don’t shame people.

Use your words instead to refresh others.

Last example…

 

Gossip

When you want to gossip, bite your tongue. It will hurt you, but it won’t hurt your friends.

Someone asked me, “But I’m not spreading gossip. I’m spreading truth. She really is selfish and rude!”

But even if you’re right, don’t do it.

People are cruelest when they know they are right. 

There are people who enjoy pointing out the mistakes of others. It’s almost a hobby. It has become second nature. They love sitting down in judgment and telling the world about people’s weaknesses.

“He’s a good speaker, but he’s full of air.”

“Shay’s pretty but not very bright.”

“My boss is a total jerk.”

“Barry looks like a retard.”

Are you going to say something nasty?

Just stop.

And if someone is about to tell you something nasty about someone else, excuse yourself.

You can say, “I don’t want to color my opinion towards that person.”

If you have no choice but to listen, tell yourself, “I’m not going to believe this one-sided story. I’ll suspend judgment and give the other the benefit of the doubt.”

Instead of gossiping about the garbage, gossip about the good. Spread the good qualities of the people around you!

 

Gossip Is Difficult To Undo

One day, a young woman spread gossip about an old woman living beside her house. And the old woman’s reputation was tainted forever. After a few months, the young woman had pangs of guilt for what she did.   With much courage, she knocked on the door of the old woman.

When the old woman saw her, the young woman said, “I’ve done you wrong. I’ve come to ask for forgiveness. I’m sorry…”

The old woman said, “Come in.”

Sitting on the couch, she told her younger neighbor, “I forgive you. But can you do something for me? It’s a special ritual…” She stood up and entered the room and the kitchen. She came back, bringing with her a pillow and a knife. She handed them to the young woman and said, “Please go up to the roof of my house and stab this pillow and rip it.”

The young woman was perplexed. But she did what she was told to do. She went up the roof, plunged the knife into the pillow, and instantly, feathers flew far and wide, carried by the wind.

When she went down, she returned the torn pillow and knife to the old woman.

The old woman said, “I have one last thing I want you to do for me. Go out now into the street and collect all the feathers…”

A tear escaped the young woman’s eye.  She knew her neighbor was trying to tell her something. “I’m so sorry, but that can’t be done,” she said. “They’ve scattered into different directions.”

The old woman nodded. “I’m not angry with you. I’m just giving you a correction in love. From now on, please only speak good words. If you have nothing good to say, don’t say it anymore. Because your words will be carried by the wind in every direction—and you won’t be able to take them back.”

And the young woman softly wept.

Friend, you can still gossip. But only gossip about the good in others. Broadcast the wonderful qualities of others to the world.

 

Conclusion: What’s Your Order?

So far, I’ve been talking about your conversations with others.

But remember, the most important conversation you’ll ever have in your life is the conversation you have with yourself.

What you say to yourself matters, because your words are prophetic.

Because life is like a restaurant.

And the universe is like a waiter, with pen and paper in hand, waiting for your order. What you constantly say, that waiter will deliver to you on a silver platter.

I know many people who curse themselves with their words.

I know people who put themselves down. They belittle themselves. They shame themselves.

I’ve heard people say, “I can’t do it,” and “I’m no good,” and “I’ll never be successful.” They don’t understand that they’re words are prophetic. They’re creating their world by their words.

I’ve heard poor people say, “I’m poor,” and “I have no money,” many times a day. Their words make their experience permanent.

Make a decision today to bless yourself with your words.

Complement yourself. Say good things about yourself!

Many times a day, announce to the world, “I’m blessed. I’m anointed. I’m favored. I’m a champion. I’m amazing. I’m a wonderful person. I’m rich in every possible way. I’m the beloved of God…”

This truth applies when you speak to others too.

Because you’re the first listener.

If you speak encouraging words to somebody, before you encourage that person, you’re actually encouraging yourself. But if you speak discouraging words to somebody, before you discourage that person, you’re actually discouraging yourself.

Speaking is like holding a knife without a handle. If the knife is sharp, it wounds you first before it wounds others.

Let me repeat: The quality of your words will change the quality of your life.

Speak God’s words and change your world!

 

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez